Before Marriage, His Wife Used to Have a Boyfriend.

All praise be to Allah.

Very, unfortunately, we are in the times where haram relations are on the rise and nearly all of our Muslim youth are engaged in haram activities. Not all relations ended with a marriage and it so happens often that a person is ultimately married to someone else.

A man found out that before marriage, his wife would date someone else. Now, what must he do now?

With regard to this, if a woman has mended her ways and has repented to Allah sincerely. If she has given up on her haram activities and is living according to the deen of Allah and there is no suspicion on her that she has not left her old habits, then it is better to conceal it and forgive her. Do not tell about her past mistakes to anyone.

Whoever conceals a Muslim’s faults, Allaah will conceal his faults in this world and the next. Allaah is Forgiving and Merciful, He forgives and accepts the repentance of the one who turns to Him in repentance. So we should be forgiving and should treat the one who has repented in accordance with the way he is now and help him to continue to repent.

It is said that one who has repented is like one who has never sinned at all. If the husband will conceal his wife’s mistakes, forgives for her past and helps her towards the deen of Allah and help her to live the life of purity and chastity, then it is better for both of them. He will have a great reward from Allah Almighty in this life and in hereafter(inshaAllah) for keeping her away from evil and on a straight path, helping her to be a better Muslim and providing for her a loving and caring home.
However, if this woman is still continuing with her mischief and is engaged with non-mahram men in haram actions then it is better to get rid of her. If she persists in evil despite being told to repent and mend her ways, then divorce her, Allah will provide for him the better and pious wife.

If she has repented, but he cannot bear what she has done in the past, and he is tormented with bad thoughts that give him sleepless nights, and he is scared that if he keeps her he may mistreat her even though she has repented, then he can divorce her so as to give himself peace of mind and avoid mistreating her. Although it is better to think about it and forgive her as divorce is permissible but not liked. A man must think about himself, how many times had he sinned in his life and expects Allah to forgive him. How many mistakes he commit and has committed in past. He must think about it and then take the right decision. If need be, pray istikhara to ask Allah for the guidance. Allaah is the Source of strength and the Guide to the Straight Path.

May Allah help us all.

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