In this post we will try to help our brothers and sisters to get rid of Haram relationships for the sake of Allah and to lead the life of pious and righteous person. We ask Allah to help all the Muslim youth to abstain from unlawful and adhere to what is lawful.
1. End The Relation straight away.
The reason is enough to end it. Tell them what you think and why. Make this your final decision and stand on it. Don’t look back no matter what. Thinking it would be a good idea that instead of hanging out as often they would just talk on the phone and meet for coffee every once in a while. It simply doesn’t work. Stopping coldly works and is the first step. In fact, it’s the only real step that you have to take.
2. Don’t keep them waiting.
It is not something to make a deal of. Don’t keep them waiting. Move on. Allah is best of the planners and He knows what is good for you. Keeping other person in wait is not accepted. This will make you both miserable, will make things harder, and will make it impossible to move on.
3. Cut all communication.
Delete all. The emails, chats, phone numbers, photos or anything that will keep them connected to you. Don’t keep any link. Avoid situations that will lead you to them. Avoid talking to them in general, and definitely not without someone else present. Don’t try to find out what they’re up to, and stop cyber-stalking them. So quit looking them up on Facebook, don’t follow them on Twitter, and knock off whatever other sneaky ways you have to find out what’s going on in their lives.
4. stop listening to Music
Yes, Music will lead you to think of them. It speaks about the emotions that may make you vulnerable to falling into Haram again. You will feel every song is about you. Moreover shaytaan will make you think that you did wrong and you must go back to them. So, delete all songs too.
5. Let it all out.
It is painful, right? We are not belittling your emotions as if they mean nothing. Whenever you feel overwhelmed, talk to Allah subhana-wataala. Cry to Him if you want to. Do whatever you can to get closer to Him. So if you weren’t already praying tahhajud every night, take some baby steps. Allah’s door is always open.
6. Take time for what you love.
Do what you love. We all have our interests and hobbies. Do them more often. Keep your mind and focus on your work and hobbies. Fill your time with things that will engage and fulfill you – and keep your mind from being where it doesn’t need to be.
7. Rekindle your relation with Allah.
Get in touch with Allah aza-wajal. Work on your relation with the creator. He has made you, your heart, He will heal it and fill it with pure love and peace. Stop looking for love at all wrong places. There is a fulfillment that you will never get from people that only the Most Merciful can fulfill. Ask for His forgiveness and put your trust in Him. He will not neglect you. And don’t be afraid to be alone sometimes… just you and your Creator.
8. Make Dua. Lots of it.
Make dua and Allah will provide you something even better than what you have left. You know the story of Umm Salamah whose husband passed away, she made dua’ for something better and ended up marrying the Prophet (peace be upon him). So know that Allah is the best of planners. And ask that He grant you someone who will bring you closer to Him and make you happy. Just live your life so that you deserve it.
9. Don’t dream too much about marriage.
Don’t think too much about marriage. Allah says:
“Let them who find not the means for marriage remain chaste until Allah gives them means by His grace.” (Quran 24:33). Dream big about other things and accomplish something real. Your whole life, and especially your youth, is not about you being attached to someone else. You’re an individual. As the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “take advantage of your youth before your old age. (Reported by Al-Hakim)”
10. This too shall pass.
If good days don’t last, so doesn’t the bad ones. With time, all will pass and you will get over it. And know that leaving what is haram will only make your marriage stronger when you do find the right one by the grace of Allah.
May Allah heal and help all.